One of the most common statements I come across in the #bodypositive community is:
“You are not your body”
And even though I totally understand and appreciate the intention behind it -to remind us that we are whole human beings, much more than how our body looks, what it weighs, etc.- I don’t personally feel that a (further) disidentification from our bodies is beneficial, especially for those of us who have struggled in our relationship with it for years.
There is ONE fundamental core-message in my work, a basic truth, that I will never-ever tire from repeating. This is partly because it is also one of the greatest misperceptions of what our relationship with food and body is really about, and how we can attain...
I recently did an interview as part of the World Health Heroes Wellbeing Show. I’ve been a member of World Health Heroes for the last 6 months and feel so privileged to be part of their innovative movement.
Most of my clients are really good at what they do, whether that’s being a loving partner, raising a beautiful family, managing a high-flying career or juggling all three. They’re impressive, collected and outwardly successful, with an effortless air about them....
Since I expanded my work into the online world, I have had the great pleasure to participate as a guest in several programmes, summits and podcasts, and speak about my greatest passion: breaking free from food, weight and body-image issues, once and for all, from the...
As we begin February this year, I am reflecting back on New Year’s resolutions, wondering how many of you set them a month ago and how you might be getting on with them…
Throughout my teenage years, when I was stuck in a diet-binge cycle, weight and body-related resolutions would always be at the very top of my long list every year. ‘I will lose 10 kilos this year’. ‘I will give up chocolate’. ‘I will get Christina Aguilera’s abs’ (who was then also a teenager and, as she later shared herself, was being forced by the music industry to be ‘toothpick thin’) ‘I will exercise for an hour every single day’. And so on…
And I would start working really hard…but then, about a couple of weeks to a month later, something would apparently go wrong, my rigid self-control would crack for just a moment, and before I’d even know it, I’d ‘fall off the wagon’ –I would break the diet, binge on sweets (or whatever I had said I would give up) or not show up at the gym for several days.
So, why is it that setting resolutions so rarely works, and, not only that, but often leads us into feeling much worse about ourselves than before we’d set them?
I feel that, collectively, we are not good at processing -especially when the change or transition is for the better or the best.
We get so excited about the new beginning, we actually *project* so much on this new place/person/job/hobby/life phase/you name it (all our hopes, wishes and desires about feeling a certain way -and only that way) that we try to convince ourselves that the ending will take care of itself. That the mere act of completing something, moving away, ending a situation is enough -that’s all we need to do. And we try to get distracted or cope with the change in any way that is available to us -and that includes food, going on a diet, or attacking our body and wanting it to change, like, yesterday.
We remain oblivious to the fact that the real ending always happens on the inside.
It is, first and foremost, an *inner process*.
And it requires lots of time and space. Patience. Kindness. And loads of willingness and courage to look inside with so much honesty, see, listen and connect with what is present for us (all of it), even if it doesn’t fit in with the image we have created in our minds, even if it goes against our expectations (especially then) and ALLOW for the different stages of the Alchemy and the transformation to happen at their own wise, divine timing.
I envision you being so in tune with your Body, that you never-ever need to have a second thought about what, when and how much to eat again.
I envision you seeing Food as living and sacred, as you Body’s and Soul’s medicine, as an offering from the Earth, as your connection with the Earth.
I sense so much pleasure in every single bite you’re having, such rich sensation; your tastebuds on fire, fireworks of sensual enjoyment exploding in your mouth, your whole Body orgasmically receiving the nourishment, the goodness.
I see you being so comfortable in your body, so ‘at home’ in your skin and flesh, like nothing had ever shaken this natural state of being; your birthright.
I envision you inhabiting every single part and inch of your Body, owning it so completely, acknowledging it as your own, as *you*, not excluding any of it.
Every Food, Weight and Body-Image Issue is, really, a manifestation of a deeper imbalance or block, in one or more of our Chakras. This is where it all begins from, and where real Transformation and lasting Freedom can only come from.
You can spend your whole life trying to treat (rather, fight) the symptom, but unless you go deep into the root causes, the inner root causes of your Food & Body struggles, on a soul level, and bring true healing and transformation there, the symptom is bound to keep coming back, in one manifestation or another.
On the contrary, when you resolve the real core issue(s), the symptom dissipates naturally and effortlessly –and more importantly, permanently.
Food and Body Freedom is your birthright, your natural state of being, when you discover and lovingly break through what’s really standing in the way…
Working on the Chakras and restoring the balance in each one of them will do just that: take away the barriers, remove the blocks that prevent you from being at Peace with Food, perfectly happy with your Body, at your naturally ideal Weight and in Love with yourself and your Life!
”I wish I was stronger than my cravings”
”If only I had more will-power / was more disciplined”
”I’m really weak, I just can’t resist the temptation, so I’ll never be able to lose weight / have a body that I like..”
I hear that ALL.THE.TIME.
From clients, friends, family…from women all around me.
And yes, of course I used to believe that so strongly myself.
The belief that the reason you are struggling with your weight and body is because you don’t have enough will-power and self-discipline is one of the biggest myths out there and sadly, one of the most common ones.